Paluu Topi-äidin reserville

Täällä Australiassa on huippua, mahtavaa ja parasta mutta silti on hyvä pitää mielessä, mistäs tähän on oikein tultu. Jotenka siis tarjoan teille seuraavaksi tositapahtumiin perustuvan tarinan kolmesta tytöstä, jotka asuivat Topi-äidin reservillä.

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Once upon a time there was girl who lived in a student hall of residence with two another girl. One girl was beautiful, smart and otherwise perfect. Another girl looks like a man, speak weird and people wasn't like her. Girl likes both of them a lot and they enjoy to be together.

Another girls was quite messy and girl clean often their messy. One day before Christmas beautiful girl ask to other “What if clean today and after that we eat a Christmas dinner?” Girl and manly girl liked idea and then they cleaned. Beautiful girl wash up the dishes which was take all table and she cleaned up all kitchen. Manly girl cleaned up floor, she vacuumed and mopped, and she clean up all living room. Girl cleaned up WC and bathroom, them was a messy place in all apartment. A toilet bowl was shitty and the WC smells like a sewer. A floor drain in bathroom wasn't clean up like on year and it was horrible. A floor drain looks and smells like a rot was death in there or someone made shit on there. Anyway, girls get over with cleaning and they decide that they gonna clean up together every week after that.

After cleaning it was time for a Christmas dinner. Because girl was more hard-working than the another girls, she cooked when the another sitting with their computers. Girl made carrot and liver casseroles, meatballs, mayonnaise and gingerbread batter. For drink they had a Julmust and mulled wine. Girls ate with candle lights and peaceful Christmas songs. Food was good and all of them ate that much that they were full. After dinner they sat to the sofa, change gifts, watch The tale of Peter Rabbit and they ate chocolate and gingerbread batter. It was good Christmas.

Elämää Topi-äidin reservillä miehekkään tytön silmin. 

After Christmas holidays girls was very apathetic and spend all their times all alone in their own room sitting with their computer until in one evening beautiful girl broken loneliness and invite the another girls to movie night to the sofa. They watch movie named The Boy In Striped Pyjamas and all of them ate bag of popcorn and drank can of Coca Cola and enjoy to be together. They called that evening a recreational activity and started to organize that kind evenings every Wednesday. Earlier they were spend Wednesday evenings drunken in locational pub and Thursday was very tired. With recreational activities they were more energized on Thursday.

Girls were living together two years in Topi-mums reserve, and in those days hold many things. One of their best memories are one wintry day, when they with their friends ordered a taxi and went eat chocolate cake to the nearby café. At the beginning no-one of them didn't dare order a taxi and the phone go around hand to hand. Finally one of them took heart and ordered a taxi and other started to scream and ramp to everywhere and try to found jacket and else.

Kuvakaappaukset on suoraan miehekkään tytön instagramista.

Girls life together was happy, even though sometimes they swim in shitpool, like a figurative not for real. Even they had middle of the shitpool they were good moments. Usually those moments be linked food, sofa and television. Many many times they sitting together on sofa, watching Prison Break or 16 and Pregnant and ate popcorn or cookie or pizza. They had a cookie can, where always was cookies and where their friends brought more cookies all times when they came to visit.

Once girls did something unusually and they played game named Crash Bandicoot all week. They played all day and night and go to school just to ate and they invite their friends play too. They just sitting on sofa and played by turns and ate cookies. Manly girl felt like she was outsider because she can’t play. Even then girls were very fun to play together and over playdays they got new own words like ‘asshedgehog’. When they watch Prison Break they may call each other like ‘Michael, are you okay, Michael’.

Girls had very beautiful apartment. They had a palm tree named Shit. On Shit they had Christmas ornaments over year, even though it die about two months after they buy it. No-one remember water it. They gave a funeral for Shit in nearby island where they let it down to river, they remember Shit and drank cheap beer. It was sad day. On the apartments toilet walls were full of pictures a Antti Tuisku and on the washbowl side was a drawing ink, which visitors can leave message on pictures. It was a cool toilet. Girls has too wall full of black and white pictures and cardboard box full of empty bottles, which get money they spend Christmas or bought a pile of hamburgers.

Miehekkään tytön insta on paras ikinä.

When the second year to living together was on half time, girl had move away. Girls study go to the another place and she can’t live in reserve anymore. Girls was sad for the change and spend lot of time together before girl move out. After girl move out, new girl moved in. New girl wasn't same like another girls at all. New girl doesn't like recreational activities, cleaning up together, Christmas, chocolate cake, popcorn, Prison Break, Antti Tuisku on toilet or anything else which was nice before. Topi-mums reserves happily times were over and even shitpool can’t come back because of new girl. Because of new girl the another girls don’t talk to each other anymore and they just spend all their time in their room with their computer.

With time the another girls mummification on their rooms and no-one hear nothing of them never again. New girl lived happily ever after on reserves autarch.

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Loppujen lopuksi tyttö päätti opintonsa kunnialla, työskenteli paikallislehdessä vuoden ja lähti Australiaan au pairiksi. Jos jollekin jäin epäselväksi. Muumioitumisen sijaan kaunis tyttö pääsi opiskelemaan yliopistoon ja miehekäs tyttö elää parisuhteessa paritalon puolikkaassa.